Characters: 4m, 3e (either male or female)
Stan: M \ Rob: M \ G1: M \ G2: M \ G3: E \ G4: E \ G5: E
Props: 6 pairs of (preferably CLEAN) boxers!
small table and three chairs
Setting: Eating breakfast in a restaurant or school cafeteria
Scenario: Stan and G1 & G2 (G = GROUPIE) are sittng down to breakfast
when Rob and his HOMIES approach them,
Rob, G3, G4, G5 are all wearing BOXER SHORTS on top of their heads.
ROB: What's up, my homies?
G3/G4/G5:
What's up, homies?
STAN: (Bursts out laughing.) Rob, WHY are you wearing...
ROB: (Cuts Stan off) You talking smack on my Nike's, Stan?
STAN: NO, I was...
ROB: Talkin' about my brand new $59 dollar t-shirt I just bought at...
STAN: (Interrupting Rob) NO! What's that on your HEAD, Rob?
ROB: Oh! My Joe Boxers!
STAN: Yeah.
ROB: They're cool, huh? Bet you wish you had a pair like these.
STAN: (After dramatically pausing to stare at Rob as if he's an idiot.)
You're wearing them on top
of YOUR HEAD!
ROB: Well, of course. Duh.
STAN: But, WHY?
ROB: Come on, man, you haven't heard? This is the latest new fashion trend!
G1: Really?
ROB: Yeah! I saw my two favorite rappers on ATV this morning, you know, Ice Pick and Hot Tea,
and they were sportin' the new look, too!
G2: Wow, that's SO TOTALLY COOL!
STAN: COOL?! How is THAT cool?
(To Rob.) You guys look like total morons!
ROB: I think Stanley's just JEALOUS because he doesn't look COOL like we do!
G1: I think I'm gonna wear MY boxers on MY head, so that I can be cool like ROB is!
G2: Yeah, me too!
G1 and G2 get up and hurry offstage
STAN: (Yelling after his friends.) Hey...guys!
ROB: Stan my man, don't you want to look COOL like the rest of us?
STAN: Well, Rob....
ROB: You've got to follow the trend, Stan!
STAN: NO THANKS.
ROB: But everyone ELSE is doing it! Do you want to be left out, Stan?
STAN: Well, YES, actually.
ROB: Then fine, Stan, BE a loser!
G3/G4/G5: Yeah, be a LOSER!
Stan and G's 3/4/5 exit stage as G1 and G2 walk back on, now wearing boxers on their heads as well.
G1: Stan, why aren't you wearing your boxers?
STAN: I AM. I'm wearing my boxers right where they belong. Tell me, do you guys REALLY WANT to be wearing your boxers on top of your heads?
G1: Well, yeah, maybe a little bit.
STAN: But, WHY are you doing it? Just so that you can fit in with the crowd?
G2: Well, DUH, Stan. How come YOU'RE not doing it?
STAN: Because I don't NEED to fit into the CROWD...and neither do you guys. You don't have to be a part of the latest trend to be cool. Jesus thinks you're cool, and that's all that really matters. I mean, who cares what all of the popular trend setters think of you? What they think isn't going to matter at all a few years from now. What WILL matter is your future and what you've allowed GOD to do with your lives!
G1 & G2 are silent for a moment as they ponder the words Stan has spoken.
G1: Stan, dude, that almost brought tears to my eyes. You are so right. I'm not going to wear
boxers on my head anymore, just to fit in.
